I just ran across a Facebook post, which attracted my attention. A young woman wrote on her timeline: “An author of a book about harmony in family life shot his wife and published photos of the body on the Internet; Dale Carnegie, the author of “How to Win Friends and Influence People” died in loneliness; Benjamin Spock, the author of numerous books about bringing up kids, was nearly put in a nursing home by his own sons, and a Korean bestselling author of “How to Be Happy” hanged herself of depression. In fact, this is all I know about the personal growth trainings.”

Kind of sad, isn’t it? Well, the fact is: Russians don’t like psychologists. There is no tradition of visiting counselors and advisers, like many Westerners use to do. Family issues are considered very personal, and so, they can only be trusted – if ever at all – to a closest friend. Reading books about relationships is not a traditional thing, either. Some people – mainly women – would read a book once in a while and discuss it with friends, but still, majority of the Russians make relationship decisions mainly based on intuition and on previously acquired personal experiences.

In my practice as a relationship coach, I have seen numerous couples of a Russian woman and a foreign man. The men would frequently love talking to a coach, while Russian women tend to close up and refuse from any contact with psychologists at all. So, coaching for couples is practically impossible in Russia, which makes the western men even more curious about listening to an expert in mysterious Russian character.